Thursday, May 21, 2015

But I'm always on the run

I think that, in the absence of a time turner from reality, multitasking is the next best way to make a day last longer than mere 24 hours as it does on this planet. I am convinced there is not a single parent on this Earth who doesn't multitask, intentionally or unintentionally. I mean, just look at my plate and how much I have on it: on a daily basis - 4 kids, 2 jobs, a husband, a house, a car, and a body (complete with a mind, a heart and a soul); on weekly basis add - extended family, close friends and their families, Church, bills, grocery shopping, disagreements; and on a monthly basis add - well... everybody and everything else (including this blog and contemplating on "My God! How did I get here?!")! I think it's time for choosemyplate.gov to rethink their food pyramide.

Hey, I am not complaining here! My daily and most of the weekly servings of this food were placed on this proverbial plate by Yours (gluttonous) Truly, I admit it, but none of these can be sent back once they are taken. ...I suppose I can return the car, but the alternative modes of transportation either don't accommodate 6 passengers at once or are waaaaay too slow. And I'm always on the run!

But back to the original subject of this post. I think that the crown of my multitasking achievement happened yesterday. I simply cannot imagine any more creative multitasking solution to my persistent lack of time to accomplish all I should in one day than the one I came up with yesterday. I, my dear fellow parents, decided to take a nap during a dental procedure. As my dear (and poor) dentist insisted on talking about what he's doing with my teeth as he proceeded, and his assistant provided beautiful white noise with the suction thingy, I decided I should use such serene moment to doze off since I couldn't double with any other activity :) Eventually, as my head started tilting ominously and I started biting down on the equipment and his fingers, he woke me up, but told me I can continue my rest once he is done. He said that, in his office, many a mother was allowed to nap after the procedure if he finished the job sooner than expected. What a great guy! What an understanding soul (he has 3 young kids of his own)! Needless to say, I didn't take him on his offer since I can't waste time doing only one thing at the time, you know.

But I am hardly a master multitasker parent. My best friend, for example, is a marvel in his own right. When his wife left on a business trip, he managed to call his mother to give him instructions on how to make an omelet, made it, fed his child while taking her picture and all the while he kept his friends posted on his progress on Facebook in almost real time! I was also very impressed by an acquaintance of mine a few weeks ago. We had a business teleconference as he lives on the other coast, discussing investments, financial proposals, scientific merit of basic research, microbes and such light topics. All the while, he simultaneously supervised cookie baking activities of his nearly-3-year-old twin boys which involved answering their frequent questions, instructing them on what to do, preventing them from doing what they were not supposed to and making sure they don't eat the dough before it even reached the oven. Not once did he raise his voice or made a jerky movement to save the dough or something. He's multitasking skills that day floored me. He's brain should be preserved for future study!

I am too tired to make conclusion at the end of this post. If you read all of it, please let me know what you have learned from it. As soon as I get enough sleep, I promise to come back and learn from your opinions :)

P.S. Am I the only one that begins to see a pattern here? First the work toilet, now the dentist's office... "Gde god nadjes zgodna mesta..."* or, in English: "Wherever you find a convenient spot you should fall asleep".


*Excerpt from the poem Sadi Drvo by Jovan Jovanovic Zmaj that goes as follows:

Gde god nađeš zgodna mesta,
tu drvo posadi!
A drvo je blagodarno
pa će da nagradi, -
nagradiće izobiljem
hlada, ploda svog,
nagradiće bilo tebe
bilo brata tvog.

Or in English (my translation)


Wherever you find a convenient spot
you should plant a tree,
For tree is grateful
and will reward you -
Reward you with abundance
of shade, of its fruit,
It will reward either you
or your brother.

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